The MotoGP authorities have recently released the new set of Concussion Protocols that will apply to the sport from this season onwards. Should they apply to Franky Morbidelli?
What’s changed ?
Just like grief can be divided into 5 stages, it turns out that concussion management can be divided into 9 R’s, which are outlined in the new Concussion Management document for this year. Luckily the 3 R’s of reading, writing and arithmetic aren’t included, otherwise every rider but Luca Marini would spend the entire season in the medical centre because they have noodles for brains, whereas Marini just has noodles for arms and legs.
Recognition is the only one of the 9 R’s worth talking about.
The document outlines the 5 signs that help you to recognize concussion:
- Confusion and disorientation
– Hell, that describes me most of the time, especially when I’m watching a Franky Morbidelli interview. - Memory impairment / amnesia
– Damn, I’m already scoring 2 out of 5 and I haven’t even started drinking yet. - Balance disturbance / motor incoordination
– Not until later in the evening. - Dazed, blank / vacant stare
– Yeah, I remember watching MotoGP races during the 800cc era. - Behaviour change atypical of the rider
– Presumably this means stuff like Jorge Martin falling off without breaking 17 bones, Bez doing a victory celebration that makes even the remotest lick of sense, or Pecco actually growing a pair.
What if a rider is deemed to be concussed?
It’s a 10 day minimum suspension from racing, including the day of the crash. Which would certainly cut down rider fatigue if they got concussed in the first of two back to back race weekends and got banned from the second one.
Should the new MotoGP Concussion Protocols apply to Franky Morbidelli?
Franky: “Not usually, no.”
Let’s look at the arguments logically:
No
Franky has been described as a lot of things, but never “alert and oriented”. Why use up valuable medical resources doing concussion checks on somebody who’s erratic, spaced-out and poses a danger to himself and others even on his good days?
Yes
Franky is a really nice guy, and it was hilarious when he confused the hell out of that interviewer by answering in lyrics from the rock song that had just been played on the grid. The Brazilo-Italianian deserves exactly the same level of medical care as the random victims of his trademark “spirited overtake that the Stewards Panel might like to take a look at”.
Verdict
What difference does it make? Remember the other year when Franky got knocked out so badly in a pre-season test session that he had to be tended to by the Marquez Brothers? (Franky sure as hell doesn’t!)
He later admitted that he’d shown symptoms of serious post-concussion syndrome for months afterwards and nobody even noticed! The guy’s so far out of his gourd that even the most highly trained AI Chatbot couldn’t diagnose him.
